somebody stole my brother's lunch

August 22nd, 2007

I received this email from my brother, and it made me laugh:

It's 2:00 pm. My stomach is rumbling, but at last I have some time to enjoy my meager lunch. And meager it is, consisting of a lean pocket (to keep me lean and pocketed), but lunch is lunch. The freezer is so far away. But that's where my lunch is, so I know I must drag myself out of my comfortable chair and 10 paces to the kitchen. Ah...lots of people seem to be using the freezer. There's some ice cream, a few frozen dinners. And down at the bottom, my half-used box of lean pockets. Ham and cheddar lean pockets. Half-used because I already used half. I know that 1 lean pocket awaits its fate at the bottom of my stomach. But wait. The box. It feels light. Surely the lean pocket can't be that lean. I look inside the box. My stomach growls angrily! It's empty! Surely no one in this building is evil enough to eat a lunch that doesn't belong to them and leave the empty box behind to not arouse suspicion. I must be delirious with hunger. Blink, man, blink. I blink. The box is empty. Stupid coworkers ate my lunch.

I will have my revenge.