Out of all the religious philosophies in the world...this is one of them

July 25th, 2008

(I found the following joke on p. 23 of Thomas Cathcart and Daniel Klein's book "Plato and a Platypus Walk into a bar..." This book tries to explain many of the world's philosophies in terms people like me can understand...mainly with jokes. This is my favorite one in the book.)

Alvin is working in his store when he hears a booming voice from above that says, "Alvin, sell your business!" He ignores it. The voice goes on for days saying, "Alvin, sell your business for three million dollars!" After weeks of this, he relents and sells his store.

The voice says, "Alvin, go to Las Vegas!"

Alvin asks why.

"Alvin, just take the three million dollars and go to Las Vegas."

Alvin obeys, goes to Las Vegas, and visits a casino.

The voice says, "Alvin, go to the blackjack table and put it all down on one hand!"

Alvin hesitates but gives in. He's dealt an eighteen. The dealer has a six showing.

"Alvin, take a card!"

"What? The dealer has..."

"Take a card!"

Alvin tells the dealer to hit him, and gets an ace. Nineteen. He breathes easy.

"Alvin, take another card."

"What?"

"TAKE ANOTHER CARD!"

Alvin asks for another card. It's another ace. He has twenty.

"Alvin, take another card!" the voice commands.

"I have twenty!" Alvin shouts.

"TAKE ANOTHER CARD!" booms the voice.

"Hit me!" Alvin says. He gets another ace. Twenty-one!

And the booming voice says, "Un-fucking-believable!"